My mamas (both my mom and Hubs' mom chipped in- ain't I lucky?) gave me a sweet new camera for my birthday. It's none of those thousand dollar DSLRs or whatever they're called, but still, this bad boy can point and shoot with the best of them.
Point.
Shoot.
Point.
Shoot.
Good job, new camera.
The classic ugly face in car shot. Also, my hair is now peach.
The classic "Bonnie, if you don't get that camera out of my face while I'm driving, I'm going to crash this car" shot.
The classic, "Oh, this is actually going to go somewhere where a lot of people will see it? Okay, fine, I'll smile," shot.
The classic road construction overlooking the sunset shot.
Not too bad for a point and shoot, eh?
I had an interesting Sunday today. You know those days where you stop in your tracks and look at your life and suddenly you're very scared and feel completely inadequate and one hundred percent insecure? I guess it was one of those. Sometimes I feel like I take little steps forward in my life only to take a giant leap backward.
It was a reflective day, full of heightened emotions and contemplative minutes. After an afternoon inside, I needed out of our 525 square apartment. I needed to clear my head. To reset. I took 1984 by George Orwell with me, because really, nothing resets me like a good distopian novel, you know how it goes.
I went to a park that I thought would be completely secluded. Where I could read and reflect and ponder. The park was jammed full of people. And I mean jammed. I sat in my car for a minute deciding if I was going to join in on the mayhem, or if I should seek a different park. And then I spied, sitting under a tree, my sister. Her kids were nearby- riding on bikes, crawling over rocks, and splashing in the little brooke.
So I got out of the car, and went over to say hello to my sister. We both have got a bit of an attention problem, so the conversation jumped quickly from a cruise to the best doctors in the city to her daughter's broken arm until we finally landed on blogging. My sister dabbled in blogging a little bit, but decided to stop.
"It's just... I feel like it's not real. Like you only hear the good things about people's lives. And you see these beautiful outfits, and their perfect kids... and you leave the blog not feeling uplifted at all.
You leave feeling like you're not adequate."
I had to agree with my sister. Of all the the things I struggle with most in blogging, this one tops the list. The ability to tell the truth. To be completely honest and real. And to not feel inadequate when I read blogs of people who are neither honest nor real. Blogging is a funny thing. Just the mere fact that you are writing about your life on such a public venue schews the truthfulness of it all Is anybody 100% honest about their lives? How come no one writes about their marital spats? Or their insecurities and doubts? Or their jealousies? I understand that blogging is supposed to be uplifting, but is only writing about the "perfection" in our life really uplifting others?
I left my encounter with my sister feeling everything I want to feel when I leave a blog- like I had been uplifted, like I had just caught up with an old friend, like everything was going to be okay.
The day overall left me with a lot of goals and hopes for the future. Things I want to do better in the future. I want to:
-Be more real.
-Be less selfish
-Be more grateful
-Bite my tongue and think before I say something
-Be more patient
-Be friendlier
-Be closer to family
-Have more faith
-Doubt less
-Trust more
-Stress less
-Laugh more
-Serve more
-Feel the spirit more
-Be more sincere in my prayers
-Reflect more
I suppose I'll start here on this blog with my goal to be more grateful. Thank you for reading this blog of mine. Thanks for making me feel important and thank you for leaving sweet comments. I guess it means alot to old Bon Bon.
(Don't forget to enter the Shabby Apple giveaway here!)
Point.
Shoot.
Point.
Shoot.
Good job, new camera.
Not too bad for a point and shoot, eh?
I had an interesting Sunday today. You know those days where you stop in your tracks and look at your life and suddenly you're very scared and feel completely inadequate and one hundred percent insecure? I guess it was one of those. Sometimes I feel like I take little steps forward in my life only to take a giant leap backward.
It was a reflective day, full of heightened emotions and contemplative minutes. After an afternoon inside, I needed out of our 525 square apartment. I needed to clear my head. To reset. I took 1984 by George Orwell with me, because really, nothing resets me like a good distopian novel, you know how it goes.
I went to a park that I thought would be completely secluded. Where I could read and reflect and ponder. The park was jammed full of people. And I mean jammed. I sat in my car for a minute deciding if I was going to join in on the mayhem, or if I should seek a different park. And then I spied, sitting under a tree, my sister. Her kids were nearby- riding on bikes, crawling over rocks, and splashing in the little brooke.
So I got out of the car, and went over to say hello to my sister. We both have got a bit of an attention problem, so the conversation jumped quickly from a cruise to the best doctors in the city to her daughter's broken arm until we finally landed on blogging. My sister dabbled in blogging a little bit, but decided to stop.
"It's just... I feel like it's not real. Like you only hear the good things about people's lives. And you see these beautiful outfits, and their perfect kids... and you leave the blog not feeling uplifted at all.
You leave feeling like you're not adequate."
I had to agree with my sister. Of all the the things I struggle with most in blogging, this one tops the list. The ability to tell the truth. To be completely honest and real. And to not feel inadequate when I read blogs of people who are neither honest nor real. Blogging is a funny thing. Just the mere fact that you are writing about your life on such a public venue schews the truthfulness of it all Is anybody 100% honest about their lives? How come no one writes about their marital spats? Or their insecurities and doubts? Or their jealousies? I understand that blogging is supposed to be uplifting, but is only writing about the "perfection" in our life really uplifting others?
I left my encounter with my sister feeling everything I want to feel when I leave a blog- like I had been uplifted, like I had just caught up with an old friend, like everything was going to be okay.
The day overall left me with a lot of goals and hopes for the future. Things I want to do better in the future. I want to:
-Be more real.
-Be less selfish
-Be more grateful
-Bite my tongue and think before I say something
-Be more patient
-Be friendlier
-Be closer to family
-Have more faith
-Doubt less
-Trust more
-Stress less
-Laugh more
-Serve more
-Feel the spirit more
-Be more sincere in my prayers
-Reflect more
I suppose I'll start here on this blog with my goal to be more grateful. Thank you for reading this blog of mine. Thanks for making me feel important and thank you for leaving sweet comments. I guess it means alot to old Bon Bon.
(Don't forget to enter the Shabby Apple giveaway here!)
