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| Extra credit points if you can figure out what the post has to do with the picture. |
I am awkward.
This is a shocking new discovery for me. I have always considered myself completely adept in the field of social skills. Back in my single days I could easily carry on a conversation with anybody- be it an axe murderer or an 80 year old grandma with Alzheimers. My skill was sociality and I prided myself in it.
The discovery was made Saturday at The Bijou Market- a boutique held twice a year, filled with 20 something year old hipster moms, bloggers, and vintage shop owners. I don't necessarily consider myself any of those things, although if I had to pick one, I would definitely go with hipster mom.
My best friend, CrazyA, who owns a small jewelry shop, suggested I show up at the market to make some connections, "Show up the last hour, tell people you're a blogger, and find some people to host giveaways for you," she commanded.
Naturally, I obeyed.
I was nervous about the whole thing. To start with, I don't like the term "blogger". I feel weird in that title- as if it is a borrowed dress from a friend that I am wearing for the weekend. Something that doesn't really belong to me, that must be returned later. Somewhere deep in the channels of my brain, I am convinced that I am not, in fact, a "blogger", that I am merely faking it, and one day soon someone is beyond to see through the facade.
As uncomfortable as I was with the term "blogger", I decided to go anyway. To leave my comfort zone, and go talk to a bunch of adorable women in skinny jeans and glaring red lipstick.
When I showed up, CrazyA was already there, running around like a chicken with its head cut off, saying hi to everyone, trading products, making connections, and doing other things that headless chicken deem fit to do. I walked around, pretended to be busy, and feigned interest in hand crocheted baby hats.
"Bonnie! Do you want me to introduce you to this lady? She's got an adorable shop and she loves doing giveaways!" CrazyA called from across the venue. I was on the verge of saying "Oh, no, don't worry about it, I'll just grab her card and shoot her an email" when it struck me. I am becoming socially inept. I was avoiding contact with fellow human beings.
I remembered the blogger meet up I had attended a month ago where I stood awkwardly in a corner, texted Hubs, "this is weird" and pretended to sip water. (Because really what ISN'T weird about meeting a bunch of women who you know only through stalking their blogs, twitter accounts, and instagrams?) I stood there until I found another girl who seemed every bit as awkward as I was and struck up a conversation using the ever so smooth line that I had just texted Hubs. "This is weird."
Looking back on that moment, I should have realized before Saturday that I am awkward in my social skills.
You'll be happy to know, however, that I did succesfully talk to the shop owner, we did successfully make plans for a future giveaway. So there. Points for Bonnie.
On the way home I got to thinking about it. What had happened to my incredible social skill? My inability to talk to anyone about anything? I racked my mind long and hard, and I came up with only one clear solution: Hubs. This was all Hubs' fault.
Not really.
But really.
Hear me out on this theory: The more time I spend alone with Hubs, the less time I am spending making conversation with strangers/ acquaintances/ friends. The more time I spend with one select person- cuddling, giggling, referring to inside jokes, sitting there comfortably without having to say a word- the less I am able to identify with and relate to other people. I am not practicing this "people" skill like I used to when I was single- constantly meeting and having to make conversation with perfect strangers.
What do you think? Can your social skills actually decrease if you are not practicing them consistently enough? Is it like basketball or piano- a lack of practice brings a lack of skill? And if so, how do you go about mainitaing this ever-important ability?
I feel weird about this whole post. Like the entire thing has been every bit as awkward as my latest conversations with perfect strangers. HELP ME!
